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Sarah Palin Joins TV Network for Mentally Challenged

Posted by feww on January 12, 2010

Submitted by a reader in Oregon

Animal Killer Sarah Palin Signs on as a Commentator with Fox ‘News’

Former governor of Alaska and the mother of Bristol Palin has joined the Fox ‘News’ Channel as a commentator, reports said.

Oil and Gas Republican Sarah [‘the Lord is coming soon’] Palin, who unsuccessfully ran for the post of vice-president in the 2008 election, and resigned as Alaska governor in July 2009, is hitting the make-believe news network scene.


[Just before this woman shot me, I was alive and well, looking forward to running around with my kids all day.] A video tribute to Sarah Palin at the Republican convention was titled “Mother, Moose Hunter, Maverick.” The word “murderer” was intentionally removed. Photo: AP. Image may be subject to copyright. Click image to enlarge.

Mrs Palin, said to be incapable of stringing a full sentence together, would start as a freshman on the channel [presumably to comment on the sports news,] Australian- owned Fox ‘News,’ said, refusing to divulge financial details of the 3-year deal.

“I am thrilled to be joining the great talent and management team at Fox News,” Mrs Palin said in a statement posted on the network’s website.

“It’s wonderful to be part of a place that so values fair and balanced news.”

“[Mrs Palin] captivated everyone on both sides of the political spectrum”. Fox’s executive vice-president for programming, Bill Shine, said, forgetting to mention Alaska’s Russian speaking neighbors.

“We are excited to add her dynamic voice to the Fox News line-up,” he boasted.

In addition to her commentary chores, Palin would occasionally host a program featuring  “inspirational tales involving ordinary Americans.” The Washington Post reported.

Asked how she would qualify  as a commentator despite her legendary public displays of total ignorance on political, geographical, environmental, social and parental issues, Mrs Palin is believed to have cited her previous TV experience when she worked part-time as a sports presenter for the KTUU station in Anchorage, Alaska in the 1980s.

When badgered for an opinion, a senior FOX network executive, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, is believed to have said: “Hey Fux! This is all a load of make-believe crock, what did you expect from Crocodile Dundee network?”

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One Response to “Sarah Palin Joins TV Network for Mentally Challenged”

  1. […] Sarah Palin Joins TV Network for Mentally Challenged […]

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